Let’s get right down to it. 2020 has been a theme park of a year. Okay, more like a side show. 😂 I’ve had some amazing highs! And to say we’ve ALL had our fair share of challenges is an understatement, but for the sake of this share, and the mental health of all, let’s stick to the good stuff shall we? Alrighty!
Spring brought new horizons for our family. No sooner than our little turned one, we closed our Colorado chapter and began a new one in Oklahoma. (More juice on that later.)
Just before I packed up my magical, snowy canyon studio, I dipped my toes into a whole new style, writing verse + hook and recording vocals one last time for my new producer friend out of Israel, Guyku Music. Go Slow, a conscious R&B single, co-released on my Birthday in April, to all streaming outlets. Shortly after, we released a music video to YouTube combining footage from my mountaintop adventures in Ouray, Colorado and a beautiful Israeli orchard where Guyku performed his lyrics.
Soon after, in May, came my first solo release since L.Y.L.A.S., produced with Guyku Music. Too Much for You, a Neo-Soul / Alt. Pop flavored record for all the bad-A bi*ches, standing in their power.
Alright, now that you’re caught up on releases, it’s time to announce my new site address,jessbraymusic.com. It’s already live, and on November 21st, amuseinharmony.com will be laid to rest. Make sure you are signed up to receive emails, as I will continue to make updates here. Baby let’s get back to the basics, m’kay?
A little caveat… You see, I returned to Instagram and Twitter this year, convinced that the only way to share my music and actually be seen was in that space. Then arose the “plandemic” + deep state propaganda machine in full swing, revealing the corruption and bias within these globalist platforms, I had been choosing to ignore.
No more could I turn a blind eye and continue to contribute to those spaces, who would rather protect pedos and crooks while censoring creative content that they claim doesn’t meet their ever changing guidelines.
I realized the power was in my hands. I could make a better choice for myself. I could free my myself and my music from those platforms, and I did! (Not saying YouTube, Google or streaming services are all sunshine and roses, but pick your battles yo! 😅) I’m really excited to invest my energy into something that’s mine, free from censorship, free to exercise my first amendment rights!
So here I am, going out on a limb, choosing to believe that I can maintain + build a true underground community on my own accord, through a space that’s been my safe haven since 2012, my very own little web. It’s been here for me all along, and I neglected it for years, allowing social media giants to own my content. No more!
I am crazy enough to believe this community I’ve created will one day grow to giant proportions. How might I do that? Build a huge audience from just YouTube and my website?
That’s right, I’m looking at YOU!
Here are a few ways you can help a Sister out:
1. Sign up for my email list at jessbraymusic.com. Subscribers get my updates first, and I promise not to be spammy. 😄
3. Like + Add my songs to your playlists. Stream, stream, and then, stream some more! Did you know that streaming service giants pay approx. .004 per full stream?? It truly is a numbers game.
4. Share my music with your family + friends, and ask them to keep the share train rolling. Word of mouth is gold!
5. Show your support + help me create more music by donating to my Venmo @jessbraymusic. How would I spend it? In home sitter for my three kids, a Vevo account so I don’t have to rely on YouTube and production costs ya’ll!
6. Comment on my content, friends! I love to hear from you!
I believe in you, Soul fam! I believe in US!
Let’s show the world we don’t need the social media giants or record labels to be heard!
Let’s show the world that a homeschooling Mama of three can create a thriving career in music. That I can live my passion and be a present Mother.
In the lyrics of Sonny and Cher, “You got me, and baby, I got you.” Together we rise!
Right after I created the image above, a dear Soul Sister from Nashville just called to tell me she is expecting her first sweet babe. Aaaaaaah, I am so giddy with joy for them!!!! 😆
I also discovered something while sharing with her. I really, no REALLY love supporting expecting mothers. The journey of motherhood is inclusively transforming…no stone goes unturned within and without. We become womben. We touch that primal part of ourselves that once lay dormant. All at once, we seed the earth and ignite the stars. Oneness with all of existence becomes crystal clear. We don’t just give birth to our babes. We give birth to ourselves. The me in this photo would not have been claimed without the sacred birth of my two starseeds.
PLEASE BE ADVISED… This is the whole, raw, complete, beautiful, sacred truth of our birth story. No details spared!
It was 1am, Monday, December 22, 2014, on the Black New Moon of Winter Solstice. I awoke with a cramping sensation. I might be in labor, I thought, so I took note of the time and fell back to sleep. About 8 minutes later, I awoke again with the same cramping sensation. Not wanting to wake my husband, Jon, until I knew for sure, and knowing that he would need his rest to support me, I continued to rest in between rushes, keeping track of their distance apart.
Around 3am, the rushes were about 4-6 minutes apart and getting stronger, and I was having to breathe more deeply through them. Needing no further convincing, I awoke Jon, letting him know that I was in labor. I explained that I should eat something to build my strength, so he went to the kitchen to bring me some soup. While he was away, I suddenly had a craving for one of my son’s organic, whole food bear vitamins, so I called for him to bring two of them, too.
This was my second birth, and I was amazed at the deep, calm wisdom within that I felt guiding me. I welcomed the experience, knowing that every rush would bring my baby to me. I trusted my body and felt fully capable of bringing our child into the world. With my amazing, supportive, deeply loving husband by my side, I could do anything.
After gaining nourishment, I went to the bathroom while Jon prepared our bed. As I passed by the mirror, I realized I was wearing the shirt my Mom gave me just a few days prior. On the front was a huge open lotus flower. How perfect! I sat on the toilet to pee and saw that my mucus plug was making its way out. I began singing that just like a lotus flower, I, too, would ooooOpen wiiiiiide.
I walked around a bit, and by 4am, my rushes were a couple minutes apart and around 40 seconds long. I texted my midwife, Jennifer Vines, to let her know that I was in labor and inform her on the status of my rushes. She asked if I would like to have doula support or contact her as things progressed. I chose the latter. At this point, I was feeling very tired, so I asked Jon to lie down with me to see if I could rest between rushes. We spooned and he rubbed my back. I could feel him sharing loving, peaceful energy with me. So soothing… Amazingly, as if my body heard my call, my rushes spread back to 6 minutes apart for a little while, so I was able to sleep between them.
Two hours later, at 6am, my rushes got closer and intensified. I sat up recharged and ready to give birth to our baby. We called my Mom to get her up to speed, telling her she could contact my Blessing Way circle of Sisters around 7am to light their candles and send good energies…and that she should arrive around 8 to be there when our 5 year old son, Abner, was waking so she could help dress him and take him to her house just down the street. She expressed that she kept feeling that the baby would come around 11am. I then had Jon call the midwife to give her an update on my progress. She said she would begin gathering her things and her team (her daughter, Carissa, and Sandee) and head our way in a bit.
The toilet, being a place of opening and releasing, felt like a good place for me, so I decided to hang out there. All the while, Jon was right by my side supporting me, rubbing my back, thanking me and telling me how beautiful I was and how wonderful I was doing. With each rush, I would tone low, primal sounds while visualizing myself opening up like a lotus. The sounds washed through me, helping me open and relieving my discomfort. In hindsight, I imagine these sound vibrations also comforted our baby from within.
My bum began to get tired of the toilet seat, so I asked Jon to prepare a bath. He helped me up from the toilet, and we danced as he assisted me into the tub. Ahhhhhh, how wonderful the water felt. I called upon its wisdom, the support of my ancestors who gave birth before me, Source and my highest guides. The sun was rising, casting the most beautiful golden hue on the woods outside my bathtub’s picture window. I felt so much love from the sacred cedars and all the nature spirits, expressing my gratitude for them. I visualized my central channel cleared and charged with pure Source energy. I could feel it pouring in through my crown and emanating throughout my being.
Still in the bath, at 8am, my Mom arrived just as our son was waking. The midwife and her team arrived at 8:30 and finished prepping our bedroom. Sandee was diligently providing doula support and giving me water to drink between each rush. My Mom and Abner came to tell us goodbye, and they left for her house.
Feeling my rushes beginning to become stagnant, my intuition guided me to get out of the bath and back on the loo. Once there, my midwife, Jennifer knotted up a sarong to create a little tug of war for Jon and I. I began pulling on it during rushes, and after a couple went by, I suddenly heard and felt a POP, followed by waters rushing out. I then vomited, but only once. After that, my rushes reached a whole new level of intensity, like crashing waves on a stormy day, coming strong and fast. I knew then I was in transition.
Uncomfortable with the hard toilet seat at this phase, Jon assisted me to a seated position on the Gaiam ball that my intuition guided me to borrow from my Mom weeks prior. My chest was supported with pillows on our bed in front of me. It was then that I felt the urge to begin pushing, and with each rush I would circle my hips atop the ball, noticing that certain positions would bring forth more waters. I was a mammal, a powerful tigress, sounding deep and guttural. My team assured me that I was very close and doing great. Though I wanted to believe them, a part of me felt they were just saying that to make me feel better, since I pushed 3 hours with my first. I realized that doubt wasn’t helping, so I shifted back to trusting and knowing it was true, that our baby would soon be born.
In no time it seemed, I began feeling down pressure sitting on the ball, and decided to get up. My team guided me on all fours, placed the ball in front of me and draped a towel over it for me to grip. As my legs were tired, I sat back on my feet in a modified squat position and kept pushing with the rushes. Oooooooooooommmm…Ooooooooooommmmm… more sounding, more opening.
All the sudden I found myself concerned over not having paid my midwife in full, yet. I knew from reading the birthing stories in Ina May’s midwifery books that once women voiced their toils, the baby came right out. She sensed my thinking, and asked me about it, just as I was beginning to share that there was something I needed to express. Once I did, and she very kindly assured me that she was not worried about it, that it was okay, and that right now, I just needed to have this baby, I got back to the task at hand.
Just as the stories told, within 5 minutes, I felt a strong burning sensation. It was like I was giving birth through my bum hole. (People don’t talk about this much, but it’s true!) Jennifer checked me, and she said she felt the baby’s head. After a couple more pushes, she directed me to raise my bum up off my feet a bit and shared, “We’ve got the head!” On one hand I was so excited to hear his head was out, but on the other hand I was like, “Then what is the hang up?!”, because with my first, once the head was out, the rest of him just slid on out. I felt a gentle tug and immediate relief…our baby was born at 11:34am!!! Since I was facing the other direction, I turned my head and saw our precious BOY!!! Surprise, it’s a boy!!! I watched as they cleared his airways and he turned pink. The song of his cries was music to my ears.
Jon helped me to the bed, and they placed our precious baby in my arms. Infinite loooove! We went right to work on getting latched and breastfeeding. It took him a little while, but he tried diligently and got the hang of it, finally latching and drinking in my sacred, natural nourishment. The placenta was born and Jon cut the cord once it was done pumping. Abner and Mom arrived at the house to check on us, only to find that the baby had been born. They came in and greeted our new family member, Arian Om. All together, our family of four at last.
Once he was done nursing, Jennifer and her team took him to clean, weigh and dress him. I hear Jennifer calmly proclaim, “He weighs 10 lbs., 13 oz.”. “WHAT!?”, I responded. She repeated herself, and I couldn’t believe my ears. He was 22″ long, his head was over 15 inches and his chest was over 16(!!), which was why his body didn’t just sliiiiide right out. I was so amazed and happy that I had birthed that much baby without a single perineal tear. Jennifer shared that he was the biggest baby she had ever caught or even attended. She returned him to my arms quickly, so we weren’t apart for long, and it was sail away to baby bliss for me.
Day 10 ~ On our sunset drive to market, I sang a song of self-love…so grateful for my life.
Day 11 ~ While enjoying some early morning sharing @ my Mom’s, I felt my late Grandmother’s (Mamo’s) presence. She has always been an inspiration to me and is now one of my main spirit guides. I sang a song of love and thanks to her and all the ancestors.
Day 12 ~ Sang li’l Abner up this morning with “his” song and an extra spontaneous melody of love. Nothing like his smile!
My spontaneous vocal offerings for the 2nd annual “Sing Myself AWAKE” for 40 days with Miranda Rondeau…
Day 8 ~ I sang a song of love and gratitude to a beautiful Grandmother tree while my son was playing at the park. Everywhere we walked, there were feathers. We offered thanks for nature’s gifts and brought a few home for our altars.
Day 9 ~ I sang an infusion of love and joy into the bowl of cereal I made my son. My reward: a smile, a long hug and an I love you…priceless!
My spontaneous vocal offerings for Sing Myself AWAKE with Miranda Rondeau…
Day 6 ~ I shared a spontaneous song with my son. Intention: FUN! It was in a flash moment, so no video was captured.
Day 7 ~ After playing with new laptop video methods today (none of which worked out), I got out my trusty camera and created a vocal offering for the joy of manifestation for all beings…inspired by this 40 day journey.
My spontaneous vocal offering for the 2nd annual “Sing Myself AWAKE” for 40 days with Miranda Rondeau…
I am a bit low-tech, without a smart phone to easily take video johnny on the spot, and making one with my camera is a bit of a production, but since this began, I have found myself with more and more spontaneous opportunities to share vocal offerings. The more I sing, the more beauty manifests in my life.
Yesterday, for DAY 5, I sang a song of peace (as invited) and gratitude (since I was singing in the space I am soon to begin my offerings). Blessings abound, and I know “Sing Myself Awake for 40 days” has been a huge catalyst. Infinite thanks and returns to you, Miranda!
My spontaneous vocal offerings for the 2nd annual “Sing Myself AWAKE” for 40 days with Miranda Rondeau…
Day 3 ~ was busy and beautiful. A recording didn’t happen, but as I washed and massaged my dancing feet in the final hour of the day, I connected with Source and sang a sweet melody as the water drained away on its journey.
Day 4 ~ Once again, not captured on video, but I got the most amazing gift today after some SUP (stand up paddle board) fun…to sing and drum over three amazing women. Intentions (set by them) ~ love, meta (kindness, compassion) and courage. We each hugged afterward and after the final offering, I was given a beautiful message of encouragement, we both cried and a group hug commenced. AND I was offered a space to do my practice. What a magnificent day! I am even more on fire with passion for my path of service.
Singing to center. Invigorated by my own organic sound. HeartSong expression. Overtone harmonics. Giving and receiving unite. Tuning the ONE heart. Sharing soul~full vocal vibes. Organic, conscious, melodic creation, affecting the infinite field. Awakening sacred voices and inner wisdom. That’s what makes my #SoulShine